Did you guys miss me?
So this whole week between the craziness of school, interviews :), birthday weekends, and work I had no time to blog, but I have been doing my research. Which leads to a topic I been so eager to blog about.
Can men and women be “just friends?”
It is the age old question no one can seem to know how to answer. Personally I think that they can. I do think that it can be challenging because as you grow in your friendship it would be natural for feelings to develop, but I have had and still have very good friendships with men. My best friend since freshman year of high school is a guy. In the beginning, we were kind of “set up” but I just enjoyed him so much as a person I wanted to just keep him forever, as a friend. He is attractive, and I’ve been around for his many girlfriends and vice verse. Still the friendship remains because it is something that cannot be broken. He is more than a friend. He is my brother. Someone I would lay my life down to protect because I love him so much. BUT I think we both had times where we wanted to be more. Mostly they occurred at different times, so we never had a chance to pursue it or haven’t wanted to take it there for fear that things would never be the same if we did.
NOW. With that being said I have a friend now that I have fallen for, and it is because of our friendship that I have fallen for him. He talks to me like he has no interest in me which leaves him open and honest, and vice verse. We can just be real with each other and say what we really feel about love, and life. As our friendship grows, the more I want to be with him. He possesses the qualities in which I would want in a man, and I don’t think I would have been able to see that side of him without us having the friendship we do.
Opinions of others: I decided to test my own theory against the opinions of others. I had one guy tell me that it is impossible to be “just friends” unless both or one party thinks the other party is unattractive. Another guy said it has to be some kind of barrier to make the friendship work. For example, he is married so he can be friends with women because he has no interest in them outside of that platonic friendship. The women I asked thought it was possible but then again as women I think we are more naive to when a man is really interested in us.
Answer: In my opinion, it varies from case to case. Do I think it is possible, yes because I have it now. I also have been in those sticky situations where it is hard to know if it is better to remain friends or take it to next level. My friends, in these situations there are no correct answers. So choose wisely!