Yesterday when I was at the Puerto Rican parade, I saw an old friend. I told him my situation, and how my internship was ending (surprisingly) next month. He said, “People like us are not supposed to work in corporate America.” My first though was like, “what are we, Xmen?” HA, and the second thought was “how true.”
Sometimes, people spend so much time trying to fit in somewhere they don’t belong. If you were born a circle, there is no way that you will fit in with squares. I am on a journey to find things that truly make me happy. My internship ending is more than likely a blessing in disguise. There might be a struggle, but I’m up to the challenge. How will anyone ever know how great they can be if they stay in the same place forever? I didn’t go to college, and spend so much money (loans) to just be doing whatever. I went to college to discover the things that I like, and things that I don’t so much. I also went to college to be able to have colleges, and not have to settle on anything. This internship was definitely an experience that taught me so much about myself. I really can’t fake the funk, and it was proven. I have no hard feelings or ill thoughts towards my manager or the people in charge that came to the conclusion they did. They are freeing me from a situation that isn’t best for either parties. There are people that really, really want that lifestyle (corporate America) and who am I to stand in their way when I don’t. That’s not to say that I will never work in corporate America again but I definitely will be looking for opportunities that suit me better. I know I want to work in the arts, I mean I went to an art school for goodness sakes. I would honestly rather work for free for a couple of days a week at an internship I really, really love then a paid one everyday that I despise. I feel like that is the difference between me and a lot of people. Money is not my main objective (though you need it to live), happiness and peace are equally (if not the most) important to me.
So right now, my hair is not the only thing beginning to transition, but just life in general. I’m 23 years old, I have no children, or a husband right now. I am only responsible for myself, and I’m in control of my own destiny. Like Pastor Hannah said at church today, “get your own oil,” meaning don’t only find a praise when everything is great. Uplift yourself and thank God for all He has blessed you with, even when things are a little unstable. I am blessed beyond measure regardless of what’s going on. I am at a perfect time in my life to stop what I’m doing when I feel necessary, reevaluate, and make changes. I would hate to be 35, and have never had the chance to perform at a spoken word, never got a chance to travel outside of North America, and so on and so forth. Sometimes, it’s that kick in the butt that you need to push through and be great.
And I don’t know about anyone else, but I want to be GREAT!