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So I have been trying to avoid this issue because it just honestly sucks. It sucks that as much as I want to blame black men for calling black women things like thot (that ho over there), bitches, and sluts, we do a damn good job at it ourselves. Whether it’s dark-skinned girls thinking all light skin girls are stuck up or light-skinned girls thinking all dark skin girls just want to fight, we have to cut ourselves some slack. The odds are slacked super high against us. The outside world already believes we are all just angry, or ghetto (I really hate this word, and cringe when hearing it). If we have nine knives in our back, I hate would for the 10th knife to come from another black woman’s bloody hand.
I grabbed a few photos from a couple girls’ Instagram. The first is from a girl I know from high school.
Maybe I’m too much of a feminist for my own good. Maybe my head is too high in the air to touch down with reality but what really qualifies someone as a bum bitch? Also, why do you feel the need to objectify another woman? I assume some women find this cute? Possibly it makes them feel better about their own situation. If she can degrade enough black women to something lower than how she classifies herself, surely that bumps her up a couple notches. Wrong!!! We are all dead wrong when we think this way, post things of this nature, or say it out loud.
I get it! There are only so many black men after death, jail, or gay. That number also decreases if we count married, past child #1, or those with a job/degree. I know this issue is so touchy for black women. We love our men! We ride damn near to the gates of hell, if not straight through but please…. I beg you to grow up! I find it ridiculous for any woman past high school level to still be fighting. I find it even more deplorable for the cause of the fight to be over a man. Do words simply mean nothing that you cannot talk out your beef? Do you not care about possibly going to jail, or IDK making yourself look like a fool? Does your self respect mean anything?!
I am so sick of Worldstar Videos being reposted on my Facebook wall of black women fighting. There is only so much we can blame on the media, or the white man. We have to take responsibility for ourselves and act as if we have some good sense.
Pretty girl this… Pretty girl that. Pretty girls are just that, pretty.
I crumble when I see black women put so much weight on being pretty. Congratulations on the fact your daughter has her that touches the middle of her back, but can she read? Are you teaching her that her good looks and her fat ass are only going to get her so far? We must teach our daughters that while being pretty may get you a baller, it doesn’t give you the knowledge to thoroughly read a pre-nup (or hire a lawyer for that matter). Being pretty is an added bonus to the other talents you’re blessed with. It is not a mean for praise and it is not a means for hate. It’s an adjective, nothing more.
I won’t lie, I’m not a fan of any black women that degrades herself. There is no hate involved, but ignorance is truly bliss. There is pity. There is this mission to save girls while they’re young. There is this desire to tell them about all the great sheros who paved the way for us. Those who thought enough of black women to write our stories, or fight for our cause. So no matter where I go, I try my best to approach every black women with an open heart. We all come from vast walks of life. We are all just trying to find the beauty in the rain while waiting on the rainbow.
As soon as we understand how powerful we are, the sooner we can move forward without so much hate for one another. There is no race, and no finish line. If you decide to destroy me, there is no guarantee you’ll get there faster or at all. Being at odds with each other, or making fools of ourselves is what the outside world wants. If we educate ourselves, always conduct ourselves in a womanly fashion, and hold our heads high, we are a force. We birthed this nation. We raised their children. We carried that weigh on our backs, and now we must put the load down. We have to take care of ourselves first. We have to love ourselves first so we can be the women we were destined to be. I believe in us. xo.